So Tired

Not sure what it is, but today I am exhausted. Absolutely no energy. I feel drained in every way.

I’ve been dealing with a lot of body pain for the last month. It’s constant pain. When I dont get any relief, it really starts to wear me down. It finally caught up to me today. I am spent.

I’m also not very happy with the fact that I gained 4 more lbs. I dont get it. I thought my weight had settled at 170 but this week I jumped to 174. I’m rethinking my eating plan. As much as I have enjoyed not being on a diet for the last 4 months, I know its time to get real again. *sigh*.  I had hoped that I wouldn’t have to go back on a diet. Looks like I have no choice.

I’m thinking that I will cut some carbs and watch the calories. If I leave out most of the grains I will feel better. I also need to stop eating so much processed foods. It’s just so easy to grab ready made food instead of spending time making and cooking it. I Just dont want to cook anymore. But if I dont, then who will?

I bought a bunch of food to do some meal prep for a week. Its all just sitting there waiting to get used. With so much pain I dont want to stand in the kitchen all day and cook. Damn it!!! I’m so frustrated!

I cant even clean up the condo. The longer I leave the mess the worse it gets and its starting to stink. I want to cry when I think of how much my body will hurt if I clean. I know. I have no choice. I am the only one that can do it. I am seriously thinking of getting a maid to come in once a week.

I’m just having a bad day.

Finally , Set point

It’s finally happened. My weight has a set point. I am sitting at 170 lbs. To be honest, I dont like that number. Yes, I know I shouldn’t pay attention to the number. I just cant help it.  am staying off the scale as much as I can. I weigh in every 3 weeks. That’s way better than before when I was doing it daily.

So, lately I have been feeling my anxiety about food. I know that what I am eating isn’t very healthy. Too many fries and chicken strips, cookies and ice cream, plus flavoured popcorn and chips. I’m not binging, but I am having a difficult time saying no to it. The worst is all the wheat. I know I can’t eat wheat all the time but it is in everything! If I could just leave out the wheat I know I would feel better.

I am going to try to plan my meals this week. Well, at least dinners. Breakfast and lunch are more of grab whatever to eat.  I found some simple sheet pan recipes. I have a list of foods I need to buy. Will do that on Tuesday. I need to start eating healthier, not just quick frozen foods. I know hubby enjoys it, but I am in need of real food, veggies and fruits. I am actually missing my low carb meals.

I’ve been trying to get rid of some clutter in the home. I feel that if I get rid of stuff I would feel better. Being clean and organized is something that makes me happy.